The Catastrophic Friendship Fails of Lottie Brooks

The Catastrophic Friendship Fails of Lottie Brooks by Katie Kirby is a diary story for 10 year olds about getting through spring term with a newborn in the house.

What happens

Lottie has bought herself a new diary and there's a lot to catch up on. Mum has been in hospital and is finally coming home with baby Bella. Molly is back from Australia at last. Amber and Poppy are keeping out of her way for once.

Oh, and she's a tiny bit keen on Daniel. Just a tiny bit. Almost nothing really.

Then she drools on the page, draws a face on the drool and names it Nigel.

You're reading her actual diary, so everything arrives in the order it lands on her. A worry, then a joke, then a fact about squirrels she looked up at 4.47 in the morning and now rather wishes she hadn't.

She is extremely funny about the baby. Bella cries about being hungry, being changed, having a bath, going to sleep, waking up, doing a poo and doing a fart, plus a long list nobody can identify. Lottie's considered verdict is that she's being melodramatic.

The best bit is how honest she is without ever meaning to be. She tells her mum she looks tired. Then that she's got bags under her eyes. Then that her skin's gone grey. Then that she looks quite a lot older. Then she's genuinely puzzled about why Mum is shouting.

The drawings do half the work too. Dad's attempt at a Sunday roast with no meat in the house produces a whole salmon with its face still on, which then turns up in Lottie's nightmares with little arms and a tiny guitar.

Worth knowing before you hand it over

The new baby brings quite a lot of bodily detail with her. Sick down Lottie's top, nappies, and a comment from her brother about where the milk comes from. There's also a joke about putting gin in the hamsters' water bottle, which Lottie immediately tells you not to do.

None of it is unkind, it's just very year seven. If your reader finds that sort of thing hilarious, it's one of the reasons they'll love her. If you'd rather they didn't come to the table with new material, be warned.

This is the third Lottie book and it assumes you've met Amber and heard the Cucumber Girl nickname. She fills you in on the first few pages, so starting here works fine.

If you've got a reader who starts telling you about their day and has wandered onto three unrelated subjects before the first sentence ends, Lottie is a kindred spirit. She does it constantly and apologises for it constantly.

What to read next

Lottie's next diary is in the library as well. The Mega-Complicated Crushes of Lottie Brooks takes that tiny, practically-nothing crush on Daniel and turns it into an actual arranged date, and then the family go to France and Lottie meets a boy called Antoine.