Rotten School 09 – Party Poopers

R. L. Stine's Rotten School Party Poopers is a funny boarding-school story for 7 year olds about a boy trying very hard to get dumped.

What happens

Bernie Bridges lives at Rotten School with his mates and NO parents. He thinks he's the coolest, smartest, best-looking kid on campus. He'll tell you so, often.

The All-Nighter is coming up. It's a party that goes on until sunrise, and the girls do the asking. Bernie is certain April-May June is desperate to ask him. She tells him to take a hike and calls him Pond Scum. (He decides this is flirting.)

Then Jennifer Ecch tackles him on the lawn, sits on his chest and announces they're going together. Bernie is horrified.

There's money at stake too. He's spent three months' allowance on two hundred pocket flashlights and a box of sweatshirts with his own face on the front. How's he meant to sell them with Jennifer hanging off his arm all night?

So he sets out to prove he's a total loser, so she'll drop him. Water balloons on a crowd of pretend-crying first graders. A wrecked karaoke machine. An egg-eating contest that ends exactly how you'd guess. Every plan flops, because Jennifer thinks each one is adorable.

The fun is all in Bernie's voice. He talks straight to your reader ("Cool enough for you?") and he's wrong about nearly everything. Kids will see what's really going on long before he does, and that's half the joke.

Fair warning, this is proper gross-out humour. There's a very detailed egg barf scene, armpit music and a duck that makes a mess on someone's shoes. Bernie is no role model either. He bosses his friends about, pinches a little kid's cheek too hard and gets the first graders to wail on cue. It's an American school, so expect fourth grade and dollars.

A child who gets upset by unkindness might not find him funny. If your reader loves a cheeky narrator and a bit of mess, they'll probably giggle the whole way through.

What to read next

If Bernie's scheming goes down well, go back to where he starts with The Big Blueberry Barf-Off, which opens with his friend Belzer bringing him breakfast in bed. Good kid, Belzer.