The Santa List

Kieran Crowley's The Santa List is a very silly Christmas story for 7 year olds about two children who might just have talked themselves off Santa's good list.

What happens

Aisling and her little brother Joe are always, always, always in trouble. So much so that every babysitter in town refuses to set foot in their house. (One of them is now terrified of butterflies.)

So when their busy parents have to dash off on a business trip just before Christmas, they call the Granite & Steel Babysitting Company. Enter Mrs Grough. Ex-army, karate-trained and completely unflappable.

Her rules include porridge made with water, bed at seven, and Hudson the dog living outside. Aisling and Joe try every prank they know. Salt in her hot chocolate? She thinks it's delicious. A booby-trapped tap? She walks away bone dry.

Then Hudson sneaks upstairs and chews Mrs Grough's precious old suitcase to bits. So she sits down, writes a letter to Santa telling him exactly how naughty they've been, and posts it.

What follows is gloriously daft. Joe gets his arm stuck in the postbox trying to fish the letter back out. A bedsheet banner meant for Santa turns into a kite and carries them (and the dog) across town. And they end up asking the toughest boy in school for help, because Victor Loozer always gets his presents however badly he behaves. From there, their plan grows into stealing Santa's list itself.

It's set in Ireland, with Mam and euros and the gardaí, and the humour is big and bouncy. Joe especially is a hoot, panicking and talking himself into deeper and deeper trouble.

There's a bit of heart in it, too. Aisling misses the days when her parents had time to have fun with them, before the business took over.

It's a great one to read aloud in December if you've got a pair of little pranksters at home. Anyone recognise the "we're always good in December" plan?

What to read next

If they're after more Christmas chaos, try Invasion of the Christmas Puddings, where Father Christmas himself sets fire to his slippers in the toaster almost before the story has started.