Rotten School 03 – The Good, the Bad and the Very Slimy

R. L. Stine's The Good, the Bad and the Very Slimy is a daft boarding-school comedy for 7 year olds about a boy trying to behave himself for one whole week.

What happens

Bernie Bridges lives at the Rotten School with no parents around and plenty of schemes on the go. He races his slug, Sluggo, on the pool table every Tuesday night. He's always got something to sell, like a backpack of chocolate bars from a vending machine gone haywire. And he's quite sure April-May June is his girlfriend (she doesn't see it that way).

So when she turns him down for the dance party because he's a troublemaker, Bernie makes her an offer. He'll keep his nose clean until next Monday night AND do better at school than Sherman Oaks, the richest, smuggest boy on campus. If he manages it, she'll go with him.

Can Bernie actually be good for a week? The fun is watching him try. He finds the school library on a map (he'd always thought it was a storage building). He tips rubbish all over the lawn so April-May will catch him tidying it up. He rushes his friend Nosebleed to the nurse, which only works if Nosebleed actually bleeds.

Sherman is just as sneaky, and he has money on his side. One tip about hot towels and brain cells lands Bernie in the infirmary with a bright red head. Meanwhile Jennifer Ecch, who is bigger than everyone and completely in love with Bernie, pitches a tent outside his dorm to keep watch.

Bernie tells the story himself, and he's so pleased with himself it's hard not to laugh. Every plan is pure genius, right up until it isn't. The chapters are short and nearly every one ends on a gag or a groan.

It's gloriously gross in places, which will be a plus for some readers! A rotten hamburger comes crawling with maggots, and Bernie's friend Beast eats things nobody should eat, slugs included. The slapstick is cartoonish too, with Bernie flattened by a bike more than once and sat on by Jennifer. It's all played for laughs.

If you've got a reader who loves a cheeky narrator with a plan for everything, Bernie is great company. A few of the words are American (fourth grade, dorm, candy), but nothing that will trip anyone up for long.

What to read next

If this one goes down well, go back to where Bernie's schemes start in The Big Blueberry Barf-Off. It opens with his faithful friend Belzer bringing him breakfast in bed, which tells you everything you need to know about life in Rotten House.