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Barbara Park's Junie B. Jones and the Stupid Smelly Bus is a very funny first-day-at-school story for 8 year olds, told by a girl who is almost six and has opinions about EVERYTHING.
Junie B. licked her new shoes to make them shiny. She's wearing her best hat with devil horns on it. She can't remember her teacher's name, so she just calls her Mrs. And she is not at all keen on the school bus.
She's right, as it turns out. The bus is hot and noisy and smells of egg salad. A curly-haired girl won't let her sit down, a grumpy boy called Jim moves seats to get away from her, and somebody treads on her skirt that looks like velvet.
Before home time her new friend Lucille tells her that kids on the bus pour chocolate milk on your head. So when everyone lines up for the bus, Junie B. doesn't.
She hides. And then she has the whole empty school to herself! There's a gold star for her forehead, a teacher's chair to stand on, an electric pencil sharpener (which does NOT like crayons) and a nurse's office full of Band-Aids. It builds and builds to a very big finish, with a lot of people running about.
The joy of it is Junie B.'s voice. She talks exactly the way a five-year-old thinks, with words like "funner" and "bestest" and a new favourite thing in the whole world every few pages. She hollers when she should whisper. She's cross and brave and a bit sad, all on the same afternoon.
Grown-ups reading along will laugh too, probably at different bits. "I'm a good hider" is said with enormous pride.
A quick heads-up. She says "stupid", "dumb" and "I hate that Jim" a lot, and her grammar is gloriously wrong on purpose. Some parents love that and some don't! It's also set in an American kindergarten, so things like the crossing guard and the big yellow school bus might need a quick chat.
Underneath the jokes it's a really kind story about being nervous on your first day. If your child has ever had a wobble about starting school or a new club, they'll understand exactly why she hid.
It's short, with ten little chapters, so it's a great one to read together over a few bedtimes. For what happens next at home, Junie B.'s second book, Junie B. Jones and a Little Monkey Business, has her parents announcing a surprise that is very much NOT a present.
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