Do Not Mess with the Mermaids

Michelle Robinson's Do Not Mess with the Mermaids is a cheeky, rule-breaking princess adventure for 5 year olds, with a baby dragon who causes chaos.

What happens

Princess Grace lives at Wondermere Castle, where dragons nest on the turrets. She'd much rather wear armour than a frilly dress. She rides a grumpy, smelly unicorn called Poop, who always does the exact opposite of what he's told (so she just asks for the opposite).

The castle moat has turned bright purple and nobody knows why. So of course Grace goes swimming in it. At the bottom she finds a glowing dragon's egg with a heartbeat, and she can't bear to leave it.

The trouble is timing. Queen Jeen and her mermaid team are coming all the way from the Outer Ocean, and everyone has to be on their best behaviour. The queen turns out to be rather snooty. She thinks her own sport is far better than troll-o, and she can't stand dragons.

So Grace and her sensible sister Portia hide the egg under the bedcovers. What could possibly go wrong? Quite a lot! There's an egg that won't stay out of the water, an imp friend who turns himself into a catapult (and then a chicken) to help, and a very long night chasing something small and purple around the castle.

The chapter titles are rules, like DO NOT SWIM IN PURPLE WATER or NEVER SNEEZE ON ROYALTY. Grace breaks plenty of them. Little ones will love spotting how she wriggles out of trouble each time.

There's a LOT of poo in this book. Glittery dragon dung lands in Grace's eye and hair (in Wondermere it's meant to be lucky), the unicorn is gassy and a baby does a you-know-what in the royal bath. Some readers will find this the funniest thing ever. You'll know if yours is one of them!

Underneath the silliness it's about two sisters who look after each other. Grace is brave and bossy and Portia is clever and kind, and they make a great team.

This is a later Wondermere book, so start with Do Not Disturb the Dragons if you can. This one picks up where that one leaves off.

What to read next

If they love a princess who ignores the rules and rides off on her horse, try The Princess Rules. Princess Florizella would much rather ride her horse Jellybean than spend all day on her hair, and she goes to a prince's ball just for the food.